Folk musicians Jason Brown and Emily Potter are committed to offering music in the spirit of joy and celebration. We, as a guitar and piano duo, believe strongly that the healing power of music can connect people to their deeper selves in order to make bold changes to live their true soul’s purpose. www.jasonandemily.com
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Pop quiz
When do you think I should cut my dreads?
a) now b) within 3 years c) after my first child d) when I get grey e) never f) other...
I like hair polls. I can’t resist posting. Your question implies that your dreads have some sort of ambiguous expiration date. So to answer your question: e.) other: when you get sick of them and want a new look, or when you no longer identify with what wearing dreads means to you. I personally can’t imagine you without them, but I’ve never seen you undreaded. I think about cutting my hair short sometimes but I can never come up with a good enough reason to outweigh the regret I’ve felt when I’ve done it in the past. One argument I’ll give you for keeping them is that I have always enjoyed the fact that your dreads seem to send a message that you’re tolerant and open minded. I think your dreads make you more approachable to people that are different than the average Peter or Molly. Plus they look damn cool… and I was surprised to find that they smelled good the first time you gave me a hug.
f) other... I was thinking today about your love of breaking down stereotypes, of surprising people... and I know you consider your hair a tool in doing so. I think you should cut them off when you either get sick of them, or you don't feel like they suit you. The other options have "outside world" influences, it seems to me. And you are NOT one to give in to peer pressure.
other. i agree with everyone else: whenever you feel ready.
my first thought was, "cut them off when they start to stink!" :) i dated a guy with dreads once. he was hot. but his hair smelled horrible. i think i even found a dead fly in them once. yikes!
i usually agree with paul about most things, but i think i disagree on something he mentioned. he says you seem more approachable because of your dreads. honestly, i think you seem more approachable because you're kind, warm, open, and loving to people around you. you give a good vibe, dreads or not.
This is so interesting on many levels. Do you know that when I asked many friends of 2002 if I should get dreads, they all answered "OTHER!" too, but as in please don't do it. Makes you think how important it is to just do what you gotta do for yourself. People will evolve around you and your choices.
Having been through many hair things myself. I didn't cut it till I felt like it, which was a couple of years between chops. That you ask means you're thinking about it. That you're thinking about it could mean that you either want to and want encouragement or never want to and want support.
Or, perhaps, you're just letting things run around your head. But I vote for ACTION!
Hair grows. Cut them and see what opens up for you because of the newness. If you don't like it, redred. re-dred. You can always re-dred. As a hair change advocate, I feel it is always my duty to encourage exploration in hair options. 2002-2007 = 5 glorious years of one hairstyle. But maybe you'll discover things about yourself that you didn't before. I am now a long haired girl and I'm so into it. I never thought it could happen to me but someday I will cut it again and maybe grow it out again and maybe shave it. Leave your options open by creating change. AND I agree with Tamara, that your hair doesn't add up to approachable mormon...that's fully about actions and choices and smiles.
b)within 3 years. I think sooner rather than later. At first i thought never or other as they mean a lot to you in terms of what they represent. At the same time you going through a life change and a whole new phase of your life somehow a change in hair goes very well with that.
I also think that you focus is changing from standing out from the crowd and trying to make a difference in the world, to being part of the crowd showing the crowd that everyone can make a difference. The best examples in life are the people you feel you have a lot in common with but at the same time do more than you and therefore they inspire you. I think you will make a even bigger difference in the world without them as it makes it easier for most people to relate to you,and therefore easier for you to inspire them.
Well, It seems there is a lot to think about here with all these comments. Good ones at that. But I have questions for you. What importance do your dreds REALLY have for you? Are they symbolic for something and why have you placed so much emphasis on them? Do you think that maybe you will be prettier without them? if so, how do you feel about that? Do you think that they have outlived their usefulness?
If I were to vote I'd say cut them - if you are happy about that. I think you have a beautiful face for short hair and that you will feel clean and fresh (and light). I think you can place any symbolism on it that you want and would be delighted to hear all about your experience with it. (including pics). I totally agree with Tamara that you are approachable not because of your dreds but because of the love inside you that you so eagerly share with the world. Do as you wish. It will not affect the friendships and love you already have in us. But as Lumina would say, change is good.
(PS. When you do eventually snip them I sure hope you save them somewhere good...)
I've been trying to decide what I think about this for a few days. Obviously, the answer is to cut them when you're ready, blah blah blah. But since you asked ME, I'm trying to decide what I think.
As your friend, I love your dreads. I think they're so cool. I think they make a statement. I think they serve to penetrate people's stereotypes, in a good way. I think they make you stand out. I loved sitting next to you in church. I love calling you my friend. I feel vicariously cool through you because you have dreads. So from a selfish standpoint, I want you to keep them always. And I'm sure it's really fun for you too, in lots of those ways.
On the other hand, this reminds me of when I moved to Oregon when I was 18. I didn't shave my legs in my late high school years because, well, I didn't want to. I wasn't really trying to make a statement, I just found it annoying. It was fairly commonplace in my highschool, and no big deal. When I moved to Oregon, though, I found that NO ONE left their legs hairy. People noticed. People judged. I became defiant. Now I was making a statement: "having hairy legs doesn't make me a hippie, what's the point of shaving legs, it's OK not to shave them!" There were probably some people who admired or got it. But mostly I found that people applied labels to me before they met me, and then I'd have to work to reverse their first impressions. Eventually I came to realize that the best thing for ME was to stop making my hairy legs the first thing people noticed about me. I was about so much more, and I didn't want that barrier.
I shaved them. It was unfair and for bad reasons in some ways. People's biases were stupid and narrow-minded and unjustified. Nevertheless, I found a freedom when I could focus on different parts of my relationships with people, and reach deeper, easier, faster, into their souls.
So, I think if that resonates with you, maybe it's time, even though I personally would mourn their loss. (Remember, it's always easier for someone ELSE (like me) to enjoy the benefits of something for which you pay the price.)
If you cut them, I want one! :) And I think you'll look really cute. You have a gorgeous feminine jawline that you could really show off - most women would kill for it. Would you ever consider piercing your ears? I can just imagine you with cute short hair, and dangling some earrings next to that sexy jawline to show it off. Or not. Whatever. You wouldn't need them. Also, if you cut them, I wonder if there's any possible way I could be there! Also, I would be right there with you if you ever wanted to dread them again.
But if that doesn't resonate with you, and you feel like you still want them, by all means, don't bow to the pressure! The Mormon Church, Salt Lake City, the people at your work, and your friends need someone like you! It does wonderful things for all of us for you to proudly wear your heart on your head, so to speak. It's just that -- you don't always have to be that person for us. Someone else could take a turn.
...anyone else? Any anonymous personages out there who would like to speak up?
A couple insights into my current hair-brained psyche:
1. Yes, I am thinking of cutting them. But I've thought of cutting them from the first day so that doesn't give you much.
2. I love all the support of not doing it until I was ready. That's what I intend to do!
3. I will most definitely NOT keep them after they're cut! And neither will you! WHY would you want to? Seriously, where would you keep it? A jewelry box? A box in the garage? How about we take lots of pictures of my head before the deed, toss them sacredly to neverland, and call it good.
4. It's fun to see what happens when you ask people's opinions.
5. My hair week has been interesting. Not that I've had bad hair days. (Dreadies never have bad hair days.) It's that I usually get at least 3-4 comments a week about my hair when I'm in public. This week it has more than doubled... about 3 comments a DAY.
My two favorites: A whole women's bowling team came up and surrounded me. "OH MY GOSH. Your hair is GORGEOUS! Don't ever cut it!!!"
And the other one was a girl in a supermarket restroom changing her baby's diaper. This poor little baby was squirming and needed quite undivided attention which mommy wasn't giving him. She was checking ME out. For a long time. Just kept talking, asking, complimenting... And see, I had come to this room for a purpose...I wasn't in the space to be gracious!
6. Emily, I want to answer your very good questions. Maybe in a new comment...
Em, I vote like the others that you should cut them when YOU are ready.
I laughed so hard when I ready your reaction to keeping the dreads once you do cut them. Yeah, don't save 'em. Gross. Do reverently dispose of them and what they've meant to you.
In the meantime, I want to share with you that I think you have some of the most stunning femanine features of anyone I've met - really. You can take away the breath of any man and gain admirers wherever you walk and I've watched those admirers swoon from a distance. From what I've gather they are smitten with YOU, your smile and your presence - dreads or no dreads. What a gift from above! I mean it with all sincerity.
For what my two cents is worth, I actually wouldn't recommend dreads to anyone. You happen to pull them off exceptionally well. It's just my pious upbring I don't think they make folks "look" better.
I hope my frankness and single-minded opinion doesn't make you sorry for asking. The dialogues have been great to read (loved Skye's) and like you shared having dreads does stop the bowling leagues among other admirers. Who else is living life with such excitement?
Again, part with them when YOU are ready to. Until then enjoy them. Who knows what tomorrow brings.
Tessha, no way am I sorry for asking! I get anything that comes to me when I ask for it.
Em, I answered all your questions and then the internet freaked out, and then I had to go.
Tamara, it's hard to even TRY to answer my own question these days. I mean, holy cow... today (about 1 hour ago) my patient who's in a wheelchair, and can't hardly talk MADE himself talk... you know what he said?! "Y-o-u-r h-a-i-r i-s g-o-r-g-e-o-u-s." I said, "You know, lately some of my friends have told me that I should cut it." He raised his eyebrows, raised his head off the bed and said, "N-O!" That was after a smiley male nurse's compliment about them. Who can even think with all of that!?
What importance do your dreads REALLY have for you?
-My dreads symbolize my connection to people, which is one of my deepest connections to God. Every bead or string you see represents the person who placed it there. I choose to carry them with me wherever I go. (By the way, if any of you want to send a bead, I'll gladly wear it!)
Are they symbolic for something and why have you placed so much emphasis on them?
-They are symbolic in that they remind me to be true to myself. I won't go into detail here about that...just know that I put about 2-3 good solid years of contemplation in before I got them done.
-I've placed emphasis on them because I've found that hardly anyone is neutral to the idea of dreadlocks! Everyone has a story, a friend, an experience, an opinion about them. So whether I want to not, it's like the hairstyle itself comes with a certain amount of innate "emphasis." I guess I'm affected by that, and living into it.
Do you think that maybe you will be prettier without them? if so, how do you feel about that?
-No. I feel like I'll be a girl with short hair. I've never been that girl, and I'm excited and scared about it. Thank you for all the compliments by the way! I'll take them!
Do you think that they have outlived their usefulness?
-Well, no. But that makes me ask another question. Do hairstyles have to have usefulness at all? I mean, are all of your hairstyles out there living up to its usefulness?
As far as usefulness, I'll miss the doors that open directly because of my dreads. Will bowling teams knock me down when I'm short haired? Will fellow dreadies stop me on the street and say, "Hello, sister...?" SISTER. It happens all the time, and that stuff feels good.
Lumina's cousin ali here. I occassionally visit your site and am inspired regularly. I also love this dread-thread and of course have opinions of my own to share.
One of my nearest and dearest soul-sister-friends had the wildest head of dreads back when i first met her. They were purple and yellow and pink and brown at times. She did become very well known for her dreads and they were very much a part of her image as well as her personality and spirit. It often confronted people with their trips about whatever having dreads brought up for them.
The dreads evolved with shells and beads she collected along the way, like you, from loved ones who she carried along with her. But eventually I think the dreads became heavy and carried perhaps too much weight. Rather than adding light to her spirit, I think they began to drain her. Pardon the pun, but eventually she dreaded the dreads and cut them as a kind of purging, cleansing, rebirth and chance for change and new life to grow out of all places but especially her head.
Sometimes i think of my own hair as an extension/antenae of my thoughts, mind, head and somedays i wear my hair differently to reflect the varying ways i might feel. I imagine the ways in which you can style your hair and express yourself is different with dreads. Though i've never had them myself.
Of course, my adivce is to cut them if and when it feels right to part with them. I simply offer my story of witnessing my friends process because a million new doors opened up in her life after parting with and purging the dreads. It seems to me that a million doors have opened in your life perhaps because of the dreads, but more so because of the being that you are and i doubt that would change without having the dreads.
Furthermore, I'm an enthusiastic advocate of change and believe change always brings new insight, lessons, light, understanding our way. So i say go for change if the mood to shed the dreads strikes, but of course, only for your own reasons and not for anyone else's.
Either way, the being that you are will radiate from your presence/image, no matter how you change your style. And perhaps you will find new and unexpected ways to express yourself with different hairstyles that you've never had. Either way, I'm sure you will continue to be recognized as a sister to many as it is clear the kindredness of your spirit as you move through this world and touch people's lives as it seems you do.
That's it for now! Looking forward to the updates and thanks for letting us into your world, thoughts and decisions like this. Inspiring and moving as always, Ali-Babba
To all: Wow. Thank you. You came out of the woodwork to give an opinion on my hair. What do you all make of that? Maybe that's another thread all together...
My answer to the quiz is:
b)within 3 years
I'm excited about the shedding of the past when I cut them, like Ali suggested. I was actually going to cut them on my 30th birthday last May. I thought how perfect it would be to shed the energy of my 20s as I live into my 30s. Then I realized that that would be YOUR story. Or YOUR story. It would be a good story to tell other people in ending my dreadlock legacy. But the truth is that I want to celebrate the energy of my 20s in my 30s.
I'm building the legacy of my 30s as we speak. And when I'm ready I'll shed whatever needs to go to make room for something else. The next three years will be a perfect start for this discovery.
In the meantime, I get to trail these ropes down my back!! Yay! It's SOO FUN!!!
Frankly, your dreads are great, and are something of a personal signature in my oppinion, kind of like my newsboy cap and Harley Davidson jacket. It puts you in a category alll of your own. Now if you ever decide to change your style, that is your business.
23 comments:
I like hair polls. I can’t resist posting.
Your question implies that your dreads have some sort of ambiguous expiration date. So to answer your question:
e.) other: when you get sick of them and want a new look, or when you no longer identify with what wearing dreads means to you. I personally can’t imagine you without them, but I’ve never seen you undreaded. I think about cutting my hair short sometimes but I can never come up with a good enough reason to outweigh the regret I’ve felt when I’ve done it in the past. One argument I’ll give you for keeping them is that I have always enjoyed the fact that your dreads seem to send a message that you’re tolerant and open minded. I think your dreads make you more approachable to people that are different than the average Peter or Molly. Plus they look damn cool… and I was surprised to find that they smelled good the first time you gave me a hug.
f) other...
I was thinking today about your love of breaking down stereotypes, of surprising people... and I know you consider your hair a tool in doing so. I think you should cut them off when you either get sick of them, or you don't feel like they suit you. The other options have "outside world" influences, it seems to me. And you are NOT one to give in to peer pressure.
other....and I have thought a lot about it.
other.
i agree with everyone else: whenever you feel ready.
my first thought was, "cut them off when they start to stink!" :)
i dated a guy with dreads once. he was hot. but his hair smelled horrible. i think i even found a dead fly in them once. yikes!
i usually agree with paul about most things, but i think i disagree on something he mentioned. he says you seem more approachable because of your dreads. honestly, i think you seem more approachable because you're kind, warm, open, and loving to people around you. you give a good vibe, dreads or not.
This is so interesting on many levels. Do you know that when I asked many friends of 2002 if I should get dreads, they all answered "OTHER!" too, but as in please don't do it. Makes you think how important it is to just do what you gotta do for yourself. People will evolve around you and your choices.
CUT THEM OFF NOW!!!!!!!
...just kidding. just felt the need to write something different from everyone else. love you em.
I think you should cut them now.
Maybe.
Having been through many hair things myself. I didn't cut it till I felt like it, which was a couple of years between chops. That you ask means you're thinking about it. That you're thinking about it could mean that you either want to and want encouragement or never want to and want support.
Or, perhaps, you're just letting things run around your head. But I vote for ACTION!
By the way, I want to help you cut them off if you do it!
Hair grows. Cut them and see what opens up for you because of the newness. If you don't like it, redred. re-dred. You can always re-dred. As a hair change advocate, I feel it is always my duty to encourage exploration in hair options. 2002-2007 = 5 glorious years of one hairstyle. But maybe you'll discover things about yourself that you didn't before. I am now a long haired girl and I'm so into it. I never thought it could happen to me but someday I will cut it again and maybe grow it out again and maybe shave it. Leave your options open by creating change.
AND I agree with Tamara, that your hair doesn't add up to approachable mormon...that's fully about actions and choices and smiles.
cut them...
cause I like new things and you have had them for a long time - and you will look really cute when you cut them.
b)within 3 years. I think sooner rather than later. At first i thought never or other as they mean a lot to you in terms of what they represent. At the same time you going through a life change and a whole new phase of your life somehow a change in hair goes very well with that.
I also think that you focus is changing from standing out from the crowd and trying to make a difference in the world, to being part of the crowd showing the crowd that everyone can make a difference. The best examples in life are the people you feel you have a lot in common with but at the same time do more than you and therefore they inspire you. I think you will make a even bigger difference in the world without them as it makes it easier for most people to relate to you,and therefore easier for you to inspire them.
Well, It seems there is a lot to think about here with all these comments. Good ones at that.
But I have questions for you.
What importance do your dreds REALLY have for you? Are they symbolic for something and why have you placed so much emphasis on them? Do you think that maybe you will be prettier without them? if so, how do you feel about that? Do you think that they have outlived their usefulness?
If I were to vote I'd say cut them - if you are happy about that. I think you have a beautiful face for short hair and that you will feel clean and fresh (and light). I think you can place any symbolism on it that you want and would be delighted to hear all about your experience with it. (including pics). I totally agree with Tamara that you are approachable not because of your dreds but because of the love inside you that you so eagerly share with the world.
Do as you wish. It will not affect the friendships and love you already have in us. But as Lumina would say, change is good.
(PS. When you do eventually snip them I sure hope you save them somewhere good...)
I've been trying to decide what I think about this for a few days. Obviously, the answer is to cut them when you're ready, blah blah blah. But since you asked ME, I'm trying to decide what I think.
As your friend, I love your dreads. I think they're so cool. I think they make a statement. I think they serve to penetrate people's stereotypes, in a good way. I think they make you stand out. I loved sitting next to you in church. I love calling you my friend. I feel vicariously cool through you because you have dreads. So from a selfish standpoint, I want you to keep them always. And I'm sure it's really fun for you too, in lots of those ways.
On the other hand, this reminds me of when I moved to Oregon when I was 18. I didn't shave my legs in my late high school years because, well, I didn't want to. I wasn't really trying to make a statement, I just found it annoying. It was fairly commonplace in my highschool, and no big deal. When I moved to Oregon, though, I found that NO ONE left their legs hairy. People noticed. People judged. I became defiant. Now I was making a statement: "having hairy legs doesn't make me a hippie, what's the point of shaving legs, it's OK not to shave them!" There were probably some people who admired or got it. But mostly I found that people applied labels to me before they met me, and then I'd have to work to reverse their first impressions. Eventually I came to realize that the best thing for ME was to stop making my hairy legs the first thing people noticed about me. I was about so much more, and I didn't want that barrier.
I shaved them. It was unfair and for bad reasons in some ways. People's biases were stupid and narrow-minded and unjustified. Nevertheless, I found a freedom when I could focus on different parts of my relationships with people, and reach deeper, easier, faster, into their souls.
So, I think if that resonates with you, maybe it's time, even though I personally would mourn their loss. (Remember, it's always easier for someone ELSE (like me) to enjoy the benefits of something for which you pay the price.)
If you cut them, I want one! :) And I think you'll look really cute. You have a gorgeous feminine jawline that you could really show off - most women would kill for it. Would you ever consider piercing your ears? I can just imagine you with cute short hair, and dangling some earrings next to that sexy jawline to show it off. Or not. Whatever. You wouldn't need them. Also, if you cut them, I wonder if there's any possible way I could be there! Also, I would be right there with you if you ever wanted to dread them again.
But if that doesn't resonate with you, and you feel like you still want them, by all means, don't bow to the pressure! The Mormon Church, Salt Lake City, the people at your work, and your friends need someone like you! It does wonderful things for all of us for you to proudly wear your heart on your head, so to speak. It's just that -- you don't always have to be that person for us. Someone else could take a turn.
Loving this...
...anyone else? Any anonymous personages out there who would like to speak up?
A couple insights into my current hair-brained psyche:
1. Yes, I am thinking of cutting them. But I've thought of cutting them from the first day so that doesn't give you much.
2. I love all the support of not doing it until I was ready. That's what I intend to do!
3. I will most definitely NOT keep them after they're cut! And neither will you! WHY would you want to? Seriously, where would you keep it? A jewelry box? A box in the garage? How about we take lots of pictures of my head before the deed, toss them sacredly to neverland, and call it good.
4. It's fun to see what happens when you ask people's opinions.
5. My hair week has been interesting. Not that I've had bad hair days. (Dreadies never have bad hair days.) It's that I usually get at least 3-4 comments a week about my hair when I'm in public. This week it has more than doubled... about 3 comments a DAY.
My two favorites: A whole women's bowling team came up and surrounded me. "OH MY GOSH. Your hair is GORGEOUS! Don't ever cut it!!!"
And the other one was a girl in a supermarket restroom changing her baby's diaper. This poor little baby was squirming and needed quite undivided attention which mommy wasn't giving him. She was checking ME out. For a long time. Just kept talking, asking, complimenting... And see, I had come to this room for a purpose...I wasn't in the space to be gracious!
6. Emily, I want to answer your very good questions. Maybe in a new comment...
Em, I vote like the others that you should cut them when YOU are ready.
I laughed so hard when I ready your reaction to keeping the dreads once you do cut them. Yeah, don't save 'em. Gross. Do reverently dispose of them and what they've meant to you.
In the meantime, I want to share with you that I think you have some of the most stunning femanine features of anyone I've met - really. You can take away the breath of any man and gain admirers wherever you walk and I've watched those admirers swoon from a distance. From what I've gather they are smitten with YOU, your smile and your presence - dreads or no dreads. What a gift from above! I mean it with all sincerity.
For what my two cents is worth, I actually wouldn't recommend dreads to anyone. You happen to pull them off exceptionally well. It's just my pious upbring I don't think they make folks "look" better.
I hope my frankness and single-minded opinion doesn't make you sorry for asking. The dialogues have been great to read (loved Skye's) and like you shared having dreads does stop the bowling leagues among other admirers. Who else is living life with such excitement?
Again, part with them when YOU are ready to. Until then enjoy them. Who knows what tomorrow brings.
Love,
Tessha
Here's what I say...
I say you gotta do what you gotta do.
So then, what exactly do you gotta do?
This "Dread Thread" is one of my all-time favorites. It's right up there with Emily Neaman's anonymous wish list.
Emily, which way are you leaning today?!?!?! I wanna know!
Tessha, no way am I sorry for asking! I get anything that comes to me when I ask for it.
Em, I answered all your questions and then the internet freaked out, and then I had to go.
Tamara, it's hard to even TRY to answer my own question these days. I mean, holy cow... today (about 1 hour ago) my patient who's in a wheelchair, and can't hardly talk MADE himself talk... you know what he said?! "Y-o-u-r h-a-i-r i-s g-o-r-g-e-o-u-s." I said, "You know, lately some of my friends have told me that I should cut it." He raised his eyebrows, raised his head off the bed and said, "N-O!" That was after a smiley male nurse's compliment about them. Who can even think with all of that!?
EMILY NEAMAN'S QUESTIONS:
What importance do your dreads REALLY have for you?
-My dreads symbolize my connection to people, which is one of my deepest connections to God. Every bead or string you see represents the person who placed it there. I choose to carry them with me wherever I go. (By the way, if any of you want to send a bead, I'll gladly wear it!)
Are they symbolic for something and why have you placed so much emphasis on them?
-They are symbolic in that they remind me to be true to myself. I won't go into detail here about that...just know that I put about 2-3 good solid years of contemplation in before I got them done.
-I've placed emphasis on them because I've found that hardly anyone is neutral to the idea of dreadlocks! Everyone has a story, a friend, an experience, an opinion about them. So whether I want to not, it's like the hairstyle itself comes with a certain amount of innate "emphasis." I guess I'm affected by that, and living into it.
Do you think that maybe you will be prettier without them? if so, how do you feel about that?
-No. I feel like I'll be a girl with short hair. I've never been that girl, and I'm excited and scared about it. Thank you for all the compliments by the way! I'll take them!
Do you think that they have outlived their usefulness?
-Well, no. But that makes me ask another question. Do hairstyles have to have usefulness at all? I mean, are all of your hairstyles out there living up to its usefulness?
As far as usefulness, I'll miss the doors that open directly because of my dreads. Will bowling teams knock me down when I'm short haired? Will fellow dreadies stop me on the street and say, "Hello, sister...?" SISTER. It happens all the time, and that stuff feels good.
When I cut my dreads, I'm not just cutting hair.
Hey Emily!
Lumina's cousin ali here. I occassionally visit your site and am inspired regularly. I also love this dread-thread and of course have opinions of my own to share.
One of my nearest and dearest soul-sister-friends had the wildest head of dreads back when i first met her. They were purple and yellow and pink and brown at times. She did become very well known for her dreads and they were very much a part of her image as well as her personality and spirit. It often confronted people with their trips about whatever having dreads brought up for them.
The dreads evolved with shells and beads she collected along the way, like you, from loved ones who she carried along with her. But eventually I think the dreads became heavy and carried perhaps too much weight. Rather than adding light to her spirit, I think they began to drain her. Pardon the pun, but eventually she dreaded the dreads and cut them as a kind of purging, cleansing, rebirth and chance for change and new life to grow out of all places but especially her head.
Sometimes i think of my own hair as an extension/antenae of my thoughts, mind, head and somedays i wear my hair differently to reflect the varying ways i might feel. I imagine the ways in which you can style your hair and express yourself is different with dreads. Though i've never had them myself.
Of course, my adivce is to cut them if and when it feels right to part with them. I simply offer my story of witnessing my friends process because a million new doors opened up in her life after parting with and purging the dreads. It seems to me that a million doors have opened in your life perhaps because of the dreads, but more so because of the being that you are and i doubt that would change without having the dreads.
Furthermore, I'm an enthusiastic advocate of change and believe change always brings new insight, lessons, light, understanding our way. So i say go for change if the mood to shed the dreads strikes, but of course, only for your own reasons and not for anyone else's.
Either way, the being that you are will radiate from your presence/image, no matter how you change your style. And perhaps you will find new and unexpected ways to express yourself with different hairstyles that you've never had. Either way, I'm sure you will continue to be recognized as a sister to many as it is clear the kindredness of your spirit as you move through this world and touch people's lives as it seems you do.
That's it for now!
Looking forward to the updates and thanks for letting us into your world, thoughts and decisions like this. Inspiring and moving as always,
Ali-Babba
Thank you, Ali! For every word.
To all: Wow. Thank you. You came out of the woodwork to give an opinion on my hair. What do you all make of that? Maybe that's another thread all together...
My answer to the quiz is:
b)within 3 years
I'm excited about the shedding of the past when I cut them, like Ali suggested. I was actually going to cut them on my 30th birthday last May. I thought how perfect it would be to shed the energy of my 20s as I live into my 30s. Then I realized that that would be YOUR story. Or YOUR story. It would be a good story to tell other people in ending my dreadlock legacy. But the truth is that I want to celebrate the energy of my 20s in my 30s.
I'm building the legacy of my 30s as we speak. And when I'm ready I'll shed whatever needs to go to make room for something else. The next three years will be a perfect start for this discovery.
In the meantime, I get to trail these ropes down my back!! Yay! It's SOO FUN!!!
E Never.
Frankly, your dreads are great, and are something of a personal signature in my oppinion, kind of like my newsboy cap and Harley Davidson jacket. It puts you in a category alll of your own. Now if you ever decide to change your style, that is your business.
Have a good one!
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