Accident

Our driver fell asleep at the wheel.

I've never been in a car accident before. I was asleep in the back seat when all of a sudden my head was bumping the roof of the van. Everyone's ok, just some broken ribs, and black eyes. I came out with just a sprained ankle, a sore neck and back.

Witnesses say that our vehicle ran through a ditch then out the other end, which lifted us up about 8 feet in the air. When we crashed back down, we bounced on popped tires quite a long way into a field where we finally crashed into a fence. When we stopped, almost immediately a man came running up to us and started CPR on our driver.

I was trying to be helpful until the ambulance came, but I was in such shock that I didn't realize I couldn't walk. I kept falling down. I finally came to and realized I would be more helpful if I just sat down.

An hour later we went through the emergency room. I was calm by then and even laughing and joking with the nurses. The other two in the van went home. I decided to come to Colorado anyway.

So here I am, in the lobby of my hotel on their computer. It's two days later. It's only now that it has emotionally affected me what happened. I realized it a bit yesterday when I felt my body leaning into my crutches, and people were talking with me... and I felt dead inside.

I'm not afraid of dying. On the contrary I'm looking forward to it. (You wonder why I say I love you so much...)

Yesterday when I felt so strange inside, I just remember wanting something familiar. I wanted a favorite movie to be on cable. I wanted a favorite snack.

I guess it's just strange only my ankle got hurt. My seatbelt saved my life. But at the scene of the accident I looked at the terrain and realized that if it would have happened just a mile earlier, we would have rolled down a steep hill, probably flipped a couple of times. If it happened a mile ahead, we would have crashed literally into the mountain. As it happened, it was a nice flat field.

There's so much I'm thinking about. So much I'm feeling. You are my something familiar I suppose.

I'm a little bit shaken up, but I'm ok. Today I gave up on crutches and I'm just using a brace which I stuffed inside my shoe. I'm even going to try skiing tomorrow. I think I need a little recreation therapy myself.

Thanks for listening.